As I search for a morsel of truth in the actions of our disingenuous plutocracy ~ I find myself always falling back to the truths of the late George Carlin, our modern day Mark Twain, who not only saw the duplicity of our present actions but was more than willing to speak his truth with biting humor and sarcasm: Allen L Roland, Ph.D
George Denis Patrick Carlin was an American stand-up
comedian, social critic, actor, and author ~ born in 1937 and died on June 22,
2008 at the age of 71 ~ but his truth
lives on.
3 minute YouTube video ~ with
over 5 million views.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=acLW1vFO-2Q
1. Never raise your hands to your kids. It leaves your groin
unprotected.
2. I'm not into working out. My philosophy is no pain, no
pain.
3. I'm in shape. Round is a shape.
4. I'm desperately trying to figure out why Kamikaze pilots
wore helmets.
5. Do illiterate people get the full effect of alphabet
soup?
6. I've always wanted to be somebody, but I should have been
more specific.
7. Ever notice when you blow in a dog's face he gets mad at
you, but when you take him in a car he sticks his head out the window?
8. Ever notice that anyone going slower than you is an
idiot, but anyone going faster than you is a maniac?
9. You have to stay in shape. My mother started walking five
miles a day when she was 60. She's 97 now and we have no idea where she is.
10, I have
six locks on my door, all in a row. When I go out, I lock every other one. I
figure no matter how long somebody stands there picking the locks, they are
always locking three of them.
11. One out
of every three Americans is suffering from some form of mental illness. Think
of two of your best friends. If they are OK, then it must be you.
12. They
show you how detergents take out bloodstains. Think if you've got a T-shirt
with bloodstains all over it, maybe your laundry isn't your biggest problem.
13. Ask
people why they have deer heads on their walls and they tell you it's because
they're such beautiful animals. I think my wife is beautiful, but I only have
photographs of her on the wall.
14. A lady
came up to me on the street, pointed at my suede jacket and said, "Don't
you know a cow was murdered for that jacket?" I said "I didn't know there
were any witnesses. Now I'll have to kill you too."
15. Future
historians will be able to study at the Jimmy Carter Library, the Gerald Ford
Library, the Ronald Reagan Library, and the Bill Clinton Adult Bookstore.
~ George Carlin, Last Words
Allen L Roland, Ph.D
Heart centered spiritual consultant and advisor Allen L Roland can be contacted at allen@allenroland.com Allen is also a lecturer and writer who shares a weekly political and social commentary on his web log and website allenroland.com. He is also featured columnist on Veterans Today and guest hosts a monthly national radio show TRUTHTALK on www.conscioustalk.net
"Inside every cynical person, there is a disappointed idealist."
ReplyDelete~ George Carlin